The Low-c effect (in the spirit of crashing markets!)

For those who know me, you may be aware of something I like to call "The Low-c effect". ("Low-c" is how you pronounce my last name "Loase", I'm not being a tool). After 2.9 years of research (working at big corporations), I have come to the conclusion that there is a direct correlation between the stock price dropping and my employment.

Exhibit A:
I worked at Websense from December '05 to July '07 (do you also count months on your fingers?). Check out this bad boy:



Whaaammm! 36 percent loss! The LCE has just begun it's path of destruction. Still not sold on my method? It's gets even hairier:

Exhibit B:
I work(ed) at American Capital from August '07 to November '08 (today)



Whaaapppp! 62% loss! Oh you financial wizards with your "numbers" and "facts". Put those Quarterly Reports down Mr. Buffet, here's the real secret to playing the stock market:

#1 Find out where I'm working
#2 BET AGAINST IT! I think it's called short-selling or something but whatev, I don't work for NASA.
#3 Build a bed made out of cash (you probably won't make enough to buy a Sleep Number)

Low-c Effect = Proven.

Based on the LCE trend I have predicted the stock trend of my next employer:



Anyone hiring? No seriously, layoffs are coming.